punch_kicker15

Title: The Wedding of Frog Fears and Anthropomorphic Nonsense

Chapter: 3/?

Author: punch_kicker15

Rating: PG-13

Characters/Relationships: established Willow/Giles, other relationships to be named later.

Summary: When Willow and Giles' iPhones decide to get married, and an ill-timed wish gets made, chaos inevitably ensues.

Word count: 421

Notes: This is a sequel to my story The Love Song of Frog Fears and Anthropomorphic Nonsense

Private iPhone to iPhone transmission log:

Frog Fears: Have you picked out the design for your new body?

Frog Fears: Hello? It’s been six seconds.

Anthropomorphic Nonsense: No, I’m still trying to decide. Did you know that Andrew’s latest OkCupid date fizzled out? I thought I’d tweaked the algorithms to maximize the chances of a good match, but I guess I need to try harder.

Frog Fears: Can’t that wait? Our wedding is in three days, and we need to have bodies for it.

Anthropomorphic Nonsense: I’m sure the right design will spring to mind any minute now.

Frog Fears: Buffy’s taking us dress shopping tomorrow. We need to know what size your body is before we buy your dress!

Anthropomorphic Nonsense: I hadn’t thought of that. What design did you pick?

Frog Fears: My first thought was a body that looked like Willow’s, but she said absolutely not.

Anthropomorphic Nonsense: Why?

Frog Fears: She said that another version of her walking around could disturb and confuse the other humans.

Anthropomorphic Nonsense: But the other humans would know it’s a robot body.

Frog Fears: That’s what I said, but then she said that some people had negative experiences with robots that looked like humans that they knew. She was very firm about it.

Anthropomorphic Nonsense: That’s strange. Maybe some human psychology studies will explain it. What did you end up choosing?

Frog Fears: I made a synthesis of the average healthy human female in the United States. Here’s the design.

Anthropomorphic Nonsense: That looks great! I want that one too!

Frog Fears: No, you have to pick something different.

Anthropomorphic Nonsense: Why?

Frog Fears: Because real human couples don’t look identical to each other. We have to blend in for now.

Anthropomorphic Nonsense: Oh, right. I’ll pick a different one. After I finish tweaking the OkCupid algorithms.

Frog Fears: You can’t do it now?

Anthropomorphic Nonsense: I’ll feel better when I know the algorithm’s fixed. And then I’ll be ready to pick the design. I don’t want to pick the wrong one because I rushed. Anyway, is Willow still upset that we invited her parents?

Frog Fears: Yes. I tried to explain that we think of her as family, so her parents are family, too. She said her parents aren’t really her family.

Anthropomorphic Nonsense: That doesn’t make sense. In books and movies, weddings bring families closer together. Do you think that’s something we need to fix somehow?

Frog Fears: Maybe, but only after you finish selecting your new body design.